Monday, July 30

dear asshole dog owners

This shows up when you search "asshole dog." -shrug-
Oh, I know what you're thinking, "some arrogant fishing asshole is gonna cry about us letting our majestic canines play in their stream, well fuck those cock-men-oppressors, we're gonna let Fluffy do whatever he wants, all that guy is doing is torturing fish."

You're wrong, actually. I'm not torturing fish, I can't because your asshole dog is gleefully being an asshole in my vicinity.

Look, its a public stream, and I get that, y'know? I mean, you and your stupid dog (which is technically off leash and thus violating some sort of law that you shouldn't violate because its causing you to piss me off) have the same rights that I do to go all about my day traipsing through the fucking underbrush and into the water, but maybe, just fucking maybe, you can try to respect my shit?

Its not that I walk up and try to sting your pet's ass with a fly, he can't help it that its owner is an ignorant asshole.

And while we're on the subject of assholes who let their dogs in my stream (yes, I said that), I'd like to point out common courtesy that some people at least try to do, but get wrong.

When you let your dog go rushing in and you turn the bend and, oh shit! there's a duder fishing, its cool you call your dog back. I mean, how the hell should you know I'm all lurking in the fucking shrubbery and shit? I like that you try to be respectful and make your monster back off, but just so you know, 30' upstream from me isn't a valid place to let the fucker romp back in.

How 'bout past the next bend?

kthnxbai

5 comments:

  1. thanks for the visual...hate that too, mostly cause I have a dog and keep it on the leash when I am not sure who/what is around the next bend.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Earlier, my Thai coworker tells me her mother reports, from Thai newspapers, that there's an epidemic of Vietmanese people stealing dogs for food in Thailand.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Been there seen that. How about the time at the launch when this guy lets his dog out, it races down to the water and takes a shit right where I'm standing? It's hard to wash that off you, let me tell you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Its official... this is the best fucking post ive ever read.. when politicans an lawyers die.... they become dogs.. ass licking dogs...

    ReplyDelete